An article by Go Mum Advisory Board Member and Clinical Psychologist, Amanda Bryen.
Recently in my work with Mum’s and their young families, it has become apparent the need to inform parents about children’s core emotional needs.
Through improved knowledge of these 5 core emotional needs, parents can accommodate and meet the emotional needs of their children.
All children have core emotional needs in childhood – that fall into 5 broad domains:
(Source: Jeffrey E. Young, 1993).
When a child’s emotional needs are met during their formative years it can enable emotional development and emotional regulation (that is, the ability to calm down and manage their emotions effectively). It also provides the child with the foundation for well-balanced emotional responses and emotional maturity into adulthood.
The resources below will provide you with more information on this topic. And of course, at Caring 4 Mums, I also provide face-to-face counselling re emotional intelligence coaching and guidance for parents and children.
Michael Grose - Parenting Ideas website & the Mood Meter Program:
Dr Marc Brackett from Yale Centre for Emotional Intelligence website and the RULER Program for children:
Dr Daniel Siegel website and book: "Parenting from the inside out":
Happy Parenting – Best of love and luck!!!
About the Author
Amanda is a Clinical Psychologist providing dedicated perinatal services for expectant mums and new mums & dads (antenatal and postnatal care). Her services range from caring for the carer (new mums), infant care, parenting information, education & strategies, through to therapy for anxiety, sleep deprivation, birth trauma, anger, and ante/postnatal depression (PND).
Her focus is to provide mums and their families with an approachable, sensitive, and professional service and her home-visit service provides a truly convenient option for new parents.
Caring 4 Mums P/L – Perinatal and parenting support service, Brisbane.
PH: 0412 94 3366
When I attended the Women's Health and Fitness Summit in September I attended a Spin Session for instructors which prompted me to research further into cycling and the pelvic floor. Here are some of the tips I picked up to ensure cycling is safe for your pelvic floor.
Is Cycling Safe for a Weak Pelvic Floor?
The short answer is yes, but like all things pelvic floor related, it is not that simple. When you are cycling while seated the seat supports your pelvic floor, a big plus. However, if you are in a spin class or riding on ground that has steep hills, your pelvic floor is exposed to increased pressure. Here are some tips to help you enjoy this great form of exercise while taking care of your pelvic floor.
Make sure your bike fits your body
Making sure your bike fits your body is the first step, so here are some tips to have you sitting pretty:
Cycling with Pelvic Floor Weakness or Prolapse
Generally, when exercising with pelvic floor weakness/prolapse, the aim is to minimise the downward pressure on the pelvic floor. Our breathing and posture impact the amount of pressure and it is those things we are trying to minimise in our cycling:
What about Spin Classes?
Spinning is a high intensity exercise that can still be enjoyed by women with pelvic floor weakness/prolapse with a few simple modifications. It is a great substitute for running too. So if you are keen to up your heart rate, reduce stress and get sweaty it may be the exercise for you.
Top tips for Spin Classes:
Join our closed Facebook group (Go Mum! Community) for more great training tips and remember to see a women's health physio if you have any concerns about your pelvic floor.
*Names have been changed to protect the innocent and the guilty.
Today I was horrified by what one of my clients told me. So much so, I haven't been able to think about anything else since, and I am now writing this article madly before school pick up when I should really be tidying the house and prepping for dinner. But the need to get this off my chest trumps domestic duties.
Cassie* was contacted recently by a major women's fitness franchise (you can probably guess which one) because a friend had listed her when they joined up as someone who might be interested in joining. Nothing unusual about that, it is common practice in major gym chains. The sales person (which turned out to be the owner of the gym) asked my client if they had any concerns about commencing exercise at the gym. Also not unusual and a responsible question to ask. The shocking part was to come. Cassie informed them that she had some pelvic floor issues and needed to adjust her exercise accordingly. So here is the bit that freaked me out...the sales person told her to do some skipping to strengthen her pelvic floor. Oh the horror!
So here is why I have got my knickers in a twist:
1. There is no text, course, seminar or Google Search I have done on pelvic floor safe exercise the suggests skipping as a strengthening exercise, EVER. Skipping is a high impact exercise and listed in the "Exercises to Avoid" Section of the Pevlic Floor First website by the Continence Foundation of Australia.
2. This advice was given over the phone without any knowledge of Cassie's medical history or a pelvic floor assessment.
3. This is a major franchise whose target market is women. It is estimated that 1 in 3 women experience pelvic floor weakness so they really should be making pelvic floor safe exercise a priority.
Before I started writing this blog article I posted Cassie's experience on a Facebook Group that is made up of trainers and health professionals that have a specific interest in pelvic floor safe exercise. I wanted to make sure I wasn't crazy and hadn't missed some recent research on skipping and the pelvic floor. The members of this group were also horrified but not entirely surprised. There comments speak for themselves:
"Wow. Just wow. I can feel myself prolapsing just thinking about it."
"Yep, horrified, but I've heard it before."
"That is pretty bad conduct and you have the right to be terrified. There is no excuse to give such advice - and over the phone - in today's information rich world. Especially in a ladies gym...oh dear..."
The saddest thing in my eyes is that it isn't entirely the salesperson's fault. Education on the pelvic floor is not included in the Cert II or Cert IV in Fitness in Australia and from the feedback I received today it is the same in other many other countries (except France, they have really nailed postnatal care). As both men and women have a pelvic floor and both sexes can sustain damage from improper exercise technique, there is no reason why this information should only be limited to women's focused fitness education. Here is what some of my Facebook colleagues had to say about pelvic floor training in the fitness industry:
"I have a degree in Exercise Science, multiple certs and courses. But it wasn't until I went through rehab with The Tummy Team nearly 6 years ago that I started really learning about the deep core. I went home and cried. I screamed in my car. And I hear the same from women around the world when they first figure all this out. It's slowly starting to shift. Slowly."
"The reality is that we aren't given enough knowledge in our fitness courses about safe pelvic floor training methods...unless we are curious enough to do research about the subject...we wouldn't know anything about pelvic floor from the fitness course programs, that's the root of the problem. And that's why we hear these sorts of comments...not enough knowledge."
"This is exactly why I would love to see every women's only gym being represented at the Women's Health and Fitness Summit. They need to be there. They need to be SEEN there."
So there are a few ways we can approach this problem and ensure more women get the help they need, don't live with incontinence unnecessarily or create a prolapse.
If you have a story, opinion or solution related to this topic, we would love to hear it.
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